I hope the cows don’t catch us!

One of my favorite foods groups in the food pyramid is protein. I love meat. I’ve been a meat eater all my life, and I do not discriminate against any meat types. I love it all – beef, pork, venison, fish, poultry, rabbit, frog, and even squirrel. When it comes to vittles, I’ve never been too picky (yes, there are a few exceptions, but meat was never one of them). At one very brief and insane moment in my young adult life I considered becoming a vegetarian…..but as I said, that was a brief and insane moment that was probably induced by some Discovery channel program. Once my stomach started to growl I quickly forgot about saving cows and started thinking about seasoning them!

However, this weekend seemed to be a turning point in my meat eating days. Now Niecey, don’t get excited about this….I’m not prepared to give up meat, but you’d be so proud to look in our freezer these days. Here’s what you’ll find………………..

Yep, your eyes are seeing correctly. That’s a whole freezer basket full of faux meat products, which just happen to be sitting directly over five boxes of Kansas City steaks! How wrong is that, I ask you?!?! As you can see here, we have ground mince, chicken breasts, chicken paties, sausage patties, brats, and a couple of different kinds of burgers. I know, I know, I hope the cows don’t drop by for a quick meat inspection! With all this in our freezer they might think we’ve gone over to the other side.

Quite honestly, I’m not really sure how this happened. It’s all kind of a blur……but I think we were in Kroger picking up some Lite hamburger buns (yes, I know that’s wrong in and of itself) and we happened to wander through the store into the vegan/organic section. It was completely unfamiliar territory for us. In fact, up until Saturday we thought that section was just a black hole in the store’s topography!

But we happened upon it, and there was no one there (hum, shouldn’t that have told us something right there???!!!) so we just decided to walk through…you know, just to see what kind of crazy foods those crunchy people actually eat, and how much they’re willing to spend on granola (I’m not judging here, I just don’t understand it – it’s not natural. Oh my gosh, I crack myself up – not natural. Now that’s funny, I don’t care who ya are!). And we made it to the very last refrigerator section without picking up a single thing. I was so proud up to that point. And then we hit the last refrigeration case and there it was – the biggest selection of Boca, Quorn, and Morningstar Farms products I’ve ever seen outside of Harry’s, and Sam lit up like a roman candle!

Since he’s committed himself to winning the weight loss competition at his work, he’s become obsessed with faux meat products, which are so much lower in fat and calories then regular meat is. I think he’d eat it for every meal if I’d let him. I don’t give up that easily though.

Granted, most of them do taste pretty darned good. In fact, I’ve recently become a fan of the Boca Bruschetta burger. Put some pizza or spaghetti sauce on it, and a scoop of cottage cheese and it tastes like lasagna. I suspect if I baked it in the oven with some mozzarella cheese and spaghetti sauce and served it over angel hair pasta it would taste pretty darned similar to veal parmigiana (oh man, that sounds good for supper tonight). Look, now I’m completely off the point of this whole post!

Point? Is there a point to this post anyway? Yes there was…I mean is. And that is, if any of you are looking for a completely meat free meal, stop by and we’ll be happy to feed ya! If you’re one of the cows…….please forgive us of our sins!

Advertisements

4 Comments

Filed under COOKIN' WITH B

4 responses to “I hope the cows don’t catch us!

  1. Sam

    No forgiveness necessary. And nothing to fear. I’m putting cow on the grill tonight. A nice Kansas City Strip steak will balance all that soy protein very nicely.

  2. Niecey

    Oh my gosh I never thought I’d see the day. I’m worried what other strange and crazy things might happen now, I’m wearing a rain hat just incase a pig flies overhead and poops on me from a high height. I’m thinking maybe you guys should go out and kill a cow anyway, for the sake of it, and sacrifice it to the gods or something, just to set the forces of nature and good and evil and all that back into proper swing. heheheSeriously though, the boca stuff tastes awesome. I’m not a fan of the quorn hamburger style stuff, but the chicn cutlet things are good. I like rolling them in italian spagetti sauce mix (the dry stuff) and parmesan then just baking them. Gives a yummy coating. Kaya even likes them and she loves meat at least as much as you guys do. Oh and the quorn meatballs, have you tried them? They’re scrummy. Not sure what the WW points would be though. And hey, those organic sections are awesome! If Hyvee wasn’t so darn expensive I’d just shop there all the time. You can get wheetabix there sometimes. And indian sauces often. We have a good health food co-op here which we’re members of, and they have real scottish oats, and lots of the good quorn and boca things etc. (we eat granola every day by the way! hehe. It’s tasty! good bit of crunch to stick your teeth into)But I know one thing at a time. Don’t want to scare you completely off.

  3. Sam

    No worries about the pigs flying. I’ve already turned them into bacon. And ham. And sausage. And spare ribs and……..mmmmmm meat.

  4. snobound

    Cow sacrificed. God’s happy. All is right with the world. Good thinkin’!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s